Shipping? Nah. 🙅🏻

Thursday, 7 September 2017

Shipping is a huge thing in pretty much every fandom, whether it's book fandoms, movie fandoms, TV fandoms, name a fandom and there will be ships in it. However, I have never been a shipper. Ever. So whenever people ask me who my OTPs and other ships are, my mind just draws a complete blank because I can never think of any. I will admit that my lack of ships made me feel like the odd one out because I just simply don't get it. I have never understood why people get to passionate about two fictional characters having a potential relationship or even why people get into huge arguments and debates about it. Maybe it's just not for me to understand. So, during quite a few moments when my mind has wandered to something completely random, I got the idea to list all the reasons why I don't do shipping. I'm not here to bash people for doing it, I just want to share my reasons as to why I don't.

Believe it or not, but I can name more pairings that I want to never happen than pairings that I want to happen. I like to think that I'm better at recognising pairings that are just terrible than those that sound possible but that's probably because I am a bitter and lonely person. Want to know some of my NOTPs? Well, here you go:

  • BatCat (A.K.A. my ultimate NOTP because I hate them as a couple)
  • Batman/Robin (Robin is a child. Why would you pair him with his adult guardian? Especially when Robin is Damian Wayne because that makes it incest and paedophilia.)
  • Any of the Batboys with each other (adopted or not, brothers are brothers)
  • Jarley (do I need to explain this? although, there were written to be a notp)
  • Thorki (this should be obvious too)
  • SuperWonder (why would Lois be thrown aside like this? for Clark to be in a chemistry-less romantic relationship with one of his best friends? give me a break)
  • Johnlock (this is some queerbating garbage)
Want to know the worst part of those NOTPs? One of them is canon. And the reason why I stopped reading comics. No points for guessing which one it is.

I have exactly one ship and it has always been cemented in canon because that's how it was written to be. If you know me, you'll know that I'm talking about Clois. I tend to go with what canon says depending on whether the characters have good enough chemistry so I don't really regard them as "ships" because they're supposed to be together anyway. There are obviously two exceptions to that. The first one is obviously the ship which will now never be named and never spoken of on this blog ever again, and the other is SuperWonder, which was actually canon at one time. It's not anymore, thank God, but it was. That was an awful time.

Don't laugh and don't judge, but self-shipping is something that I do. Self-shipping is basically where you ship yourself with a fictional character. Some people think that's it weird, but I really don't care. I get a lot of comfort from reading reader-insert fics whenever I'm feeling sad or anxious and it's not something that I can really put into words. Not to make this post sad or sound like I'm begging for sympathy, but I don't leave me house very often. I don't know how to socialise both in the real world and online and other people make me extremely nervous. If making up an OC that is basically me but never writing about them and instead reading what other people have written makes me feel comforted and more at ease when I'm alone, than so be it. I can fantasise about being married to Bruce Wayne if I want to; it doesn't hurt anybody. it's probably the reason why i dislike catwoman so much, but let's not talk about that.

I have ASD and because of that I have an incredibly difficult time reading other people's emotions if they're not incredibly obvious. Some people can spot some serious romantic tension between two characters just by the way their eyes flicker, but I just can't do that because my brain won't let me. To me, if a romance between two characters isn't built up in a conventional way, then it'll just fly right over my head. For example, I understand how Clois is a couple because they went through the conventional process: colleagues to friends to lovers, with dates and two-sided romance and flirting and all that. Compare that to BatCat: we have one-sided flirting to annoy the other person, to somehow hidden feelings, to sort-of allies, to having sex on a rooftop. Yeah, I don't see the sparks there. What I'm getting at is: it has to be incredibly obvious on both sides for me to see it.
Are you big on shipping? Who's your OTP? Do you have any NOTPs?

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